Filling a Cracked Bucket

cracked bucketRecently, I’ve been discovering that my techniques and strategies to talk with my soon to be eight-year-old are insufficient. For the past couple of years when I have been asked a question about this confusing complex world we live in I pulled ideas form books, television shows, and movies she was familiar with. She was engaged and the conversations never had a conclusion.  It was open for ongoing follow-up questions from either of us. While I continue to use the past books, television shows and movies her questions are requiring me to go beyond the immediate content and extend it to abstract concepts that go beyond the storylines.  In short, Daniel Tiger, Zootopia and Have you Filled a Bucket Today are a bit too simple for my daughter…but that doesn’t mean they don’t continue to be the foundation of our conversations.  It is the idea of creating a foundation early on that is central to discussing (in)justice and (in)equity with young children.

The most recent challenge occurred when she asked me, “Why don’t we adopt a child who is in foster care.  They need families.” As usual, I had to pause and consider a formulated response that made sense to my experiences. Continue reading

Why Don’t We Ever See Children With Disabilities at the Playground?

Don't call me specialAbout a week ago, I was supervising my daughters as they played on a playground.  This was a new playground for us.  It was pretty typical.  A ground cover of wood chips, slides, bars to climb across, walls to climb up, etc.  They also had six swings, two for babies and toddlers, two traditional and, less common two adaptive swings.  These swings are typically blue or red, look like an upright reclining chair, and have four chains connecting them to the cross bar; two in the front and two in the back.  They are designed to support children who do not have the size, core strength or muscle tone to sit on the other swings. Also rare for playgrounds were the rubber walkway/ramps that wove through the wood chips.  Each ramp lead to a piece of playground equipment.  I took brief notice of these features, but I didn’t consider them something worth pointing out to the children.  I was wrong.

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Rights Versus Privileges, No Chipoltle!

I have the right to be a childI was at my favorite bookstore a couple weeks back when I was introduced to the book, “I have the right to be a child.”  This book is an amazing conversation starter…and awesome to reference right before a tantrum.  I now reference it more often than “Have you filled a bucket.”  It became particularly handy this afternoon when the children were begging to eat dinner at Chipotle. Continue reading

Why Do They Want to Build a Wall? Listen, and Speak Up!

First in a three part blog series on social justice by Dr. Andrew Goff…because #OurKidsAreListening.

Last January, my six-year-old daughter Addi and I were driving home from the grocery store when I encountered a new phase of my life as a father. I was busy thinking about dinner with public radio quietly playing in the background. Suddenly, she asked, “Why would they want to build a wall? Will we still be able to see Vito (great grandfather in Juarez, Mexico)?”

Pause five seconds…boarder? Wait, what?…I didn’t turn off the radio when the news came on!…deep breath in… “That’s a very good question sweetie, let’s talk about that as soon as we get home.”

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When She Asked About Mental Illness

Driving home from school

Daddy, what is mental illness?…well sweetie, like all of the other amazing questions you ask me, the answer is not easy for me to explain. Can you let me think about it for a little while? I won’t have a great answer, but I’ll try my best… Continue reading

Why Do the Football Players Take a Knee?

Taking a kneeOn our way to school this morning my six-year-old asked me about taking a knee during the national anthem. Like all of our other conversation about SJ and E, it was amazing! This is the first have chosen to share, because they are always very personal and I do not want anyone to think that I believe I have the right answers. However, this particular conversation was is one I feel people need to think about long and hard. Continue reading